Hello! And WELCOME to the LATEST "Zillafile"(tm) A "Your Brain on Drugs Production". And here we GO... another adventure with americas FAVORITE pot smoking modem geek with a bad attitude, Godzilla! I know if you have ever read any of my other files that you are expecting it.. so here it goes... THIS FILE IS MADE FOR ENTERTAINMENT PURPOSES ONLY AND IS MEANT TO BE EDUCATIONAL... JUST CAUSE THE SHIT LISTED WORKS, YOU DON'T HAVE TO TRY IT... There, now MY ass is covered... This will sound bad, but at the time im writing this, i suffer from terror blok... similar to writers block.. im just hitting in keys in hopes of coming up with a nifty and interesting for this "Zillafile"(tm).. one that you will both adore and cherish.. something to remember me by... < no, this isnt the last one, by ANY means>... I got it.. stuff that is easy to steal that noone really ever steals because it sounds too stupid to steal... Yeah.. thats it... i like it... yaknow the stuff.. stuff that costs not alot, that you would feel stupid going to jail for, but you buy without thinking.. I'm gonna aim this more towards people out on there own, not the younger folk... Anyway... i might add something on to the end, so im glad you D/l'ed this from somewhere.. and AWAY we go... Besides.. even if you DONT do anything listed.. at least im entertaining you for a few minutes before you delete this offa yer HD or transfer it all over the place to help yer ratio.. whatever.. HOW TO STEAL USEFUL THINGS WITH ALMOST NO RISK... MORE SPECIFICALLY, A LIST OF THINGS THAT YOU CAN STEAL AND WHERE TO GET THE THINGS... Ever need light bulbs and are too cheap to spend $2 on a 3 pack? Go rip em offa peoples front porches.. of abandoned houses.. people rarely take the outdoor lightbulbs, and it beats buying them.. Do you own a car? Ever have a headlight burn out? Dont wanna spend 8-15$ on a new one? Go steal one! i have found that the best place to do this is at a gas station with a repair bay that is closed ... there are usually cars out front that are NOT in easy view, and you can easily sneak in and out with a headlight.. just remember that there are only about like 4 sizes, so yer bound to get it right.. go to a Auto store and make yerrself familiar with em.. Ya want a full size spare with a new tire? Depending on yer car, you can go to a closed dealer, jack up a NEW car, take the wheel, and leave the car on a cinder block... WALA... insta fix a flat.. literally... Anyway, car lots RARELY have security on em, and cops dont bother themselves.. Really... Want a peice of candy? Ever see those things that say "Put in $.25 for a candy" for charity, and noones around? Whats stopping you from grabbing a handful? Why not? Who the hell cares? does yer car need windshield wipers? Go to a parking lot and get some! Once again, ANOTHER valuble item you can get at a closed car dealer... Beats paying the $5 for new ones, doesnt it? Ever got a love partner ready to let you stick yer wick into her sweet velvet? She is ready for it, and yer ready... and you realize "Shit! Forgot to buy rubbers!!" well, if ya got some saran wrap in the pantry, ya got a rubber.. simply double wrap yer rascal, and pork away!!.. it works for me when i ferget to buy em.. ever wanted to REALLY beat the hell out of someone for NO real reason other than the "Experiance"? I mean literally baseball bat a guy into unconciousnes? .. well, heres what you do.. Go to a shitty neighborhood.. like a downtown area.. find out where the bums sleep.. find one alone... and beat him up.. if ya wanna ad a sick twist, tell him its a stickup.. homeless people dont carry guns.. why WOULD they? they would rather have a nice cold bottle of MD 20/20... need shoelaces? go to a "Help yerself" shoe store, like Fayva, and simply switch laces with a "floor model"... grin.. thats a couple bux saved right there... How would you like all the major cereal companies sendng you free coupons for free boxes of cereal? i mean i know I like my froot loops... Especially when there free... simply send a letter to the company with some horror story of a bug in the box or some other gross thing.. youll get a letter of apologie plus a coupon or two for a FREE BIG BOX of a cereal.. Yum.. ============================================================================= OK.. now that i have racked my brain on THAT subject, and i realize that it isnt BIG enuff for its own file, im gonna fill the rest with abstract thoughts... VERY abstract.. just follow along and be entertained, Dammit.. Smoking banana peels is a farce.. Kids, your dick DOESNT really get bigger every time you fuck.. No, there ISNt a santa claus, a Tooth fairy, or a Easter bunny.. Also, evolution isnt a lie, and the world is shaped like a burrito. Any conveiniance store that advertises "Cold Beer""Cigarettes""Newstand" in their front window, is expensive as all git out. Dont eat yellow snow... God made Weed, Man made booze, who do YOU trust.. 2 out of 3 street drug dealers dont sell weed... most of em are crack.. See? Countrys going to hell in a bucket.. Cant even get weed anymore.. If you have a pet snake, dont feed it birds, it will give the snake a bad case of the shits.. Dont call the Crypt BBS... It is Gross Buckets.. if you dont have the #, good. if you do, forget it... Its THAT BAD... like dying via a Acid enema... Yep.. aint that terrible.. Mopeds are like fat women.. there both fun to ride till yer freinds catch you... Want a cheap cure for athletes foot? This sounds bad, but it works.. Pee on yer foot in the shower every day. the ammonia kills it.. Want to blow the minds of the Jehova's Witnesses that come knockng on yer door? Simply answer it naked, with a hard on, and look over yer shoulder and shout "Ill be right there bro" and shut the door.. THEN watch em so they cant see you.. they will flip. Ever nair a cat so it looks like a poodle? Thats good for a laugh.. as long as it isnt yer cat... Be a GOOD user, like Tempus... BTW... since alot of people read these files, im gonna use it to my advantage.. FOR SALE 1984 Dodge Diplomat, 104,000 miles, COLD a/c, HOT heat, Can and does beat mustang 5.0's with ease, runs great.. needs paint.. Have complete history of car, NEW expensive tires.. $1800 OBO... Email me where it says below.. OR call 925-1377 and email me there... ... Suicide hotline... Please hold. Will a proctologist please report to the emergency room, theres a asshole waiting. Anyway... its 5 am, im tired, im beat, im stoned, im going to bed.. I know this isnt one of the more informative "Zillafiles"(tm) but i think you will find it entertaining... And imagine, im like this all the time! .. Oh, i gotta say this, too.. Metro Dade PD? FUCK YOU!!!!!!! HAHAHAHAHAHA!!!! ... Anyway, If you have any suggestions/Comments/Crude remarks about this or any other "Your Brain on Drugs" "Zillafiles"(tm)... I can be reached at the following BBS... ============================================================================== The Citadel BBS.................... (305) 785-4038 ... Tell em I sent ya. ============================================================================== Peace Out... Burnin in '92!!!!! Look fer more of my shit headin yer way, to a BBS near YOU! OH OH OH OH!!!! I fergot to say! as usual, no part of this text file may be edited, changed, messed with, discomboobulated, or otherwise changed without the approval of Godzilla.. if you DO change it, and Godzilla finds out, yer in DEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEP Shit... .. but nah, dont change it folks.. its all i got...