10 May 97 rickdobs@mail.sunlink.net If you are a parent, and in punishing your child (for doing wrong, of course- not just for bothering you!) you leave bruises or cause bleeding... you may need help in controlling your anger!!! If you are a child, and you always seem to make your parent or parents angry enough to hit you... your parents need help in controlling their anger!!! Discipline is a tool that should not be overused in a family environment!! Children learn more by doing and listening to instruction (complete instruction!- not just "because I said so") than they do when they're afraid!! I know... I was a frightened child. I also know that it is SOOO easy to do as was done to you!!!!! I know... I have frightened children. The cycle must be broken with conscious effort, with constant reminders!!! You must be aware of your intentions, but more importantly, be in control of your anger. Don't let your anger determine the punishment to be metered out to a child. That would make you, the adult, nothing more than a bully. There are already plenty of bullies in the neighborhood, one more won't be necessary! It would serve no purpose for me to sit here and tell anyone what I think is to be considered child-abuse. It would just be my opinion and everyone who reads this would have a different list. However, I can say that anything that is more violant than an OCCASSIONAL spanking (1-2 swats) can be suspect, especially if the punishment leaves bruises or causes bleeding! If you have already done the unthinkable to your child... be adult enough to admit that you have a problem that's bigger than you are!! Help is just a phone call away (a friend, a parent or grandparent, a therapist... ) Make the call!!! Thank you for reading!