Path: senator-bedfellow.mit.edu!bloom-beacon.mit.edu!newsfeed.internetmci.com!uwm.edu!spool.mu.edu!munnari.OZ.AU!news.uwa.edu.au!styx.uwa.edu.au!not-for-mail From: Rod Swift Newsgroups: soc.support.youth.gay-lesbian-bi,news.answers Subject: soc.support.youth.gay-lesbian-bi FAQ Date: 3 Aug 1996 20:12:04 +0800 Organization: UCC, University of Western Australia Lines: 653 Sender: rod@mermaid.ucc.gu.uwa.edu.au Approved: rod@nether.net (R Swift -- newsgroup co-moderator) Message-ID: <4tvfmk$5lu@mermaid.ucc.gu.uwa.edu.au> NNTP-Posting-Host: mermaid.ucc.gu.uwa.edu.au Archive-name: support/glb-youth-faq Posting-Frequency: monthly Last-modified: 1995/06/29 URL: http://www.youth.org/ssyglb/ssyglb-faq.html Xref: senator-bedfellow.mit.edu soc.support.youth.gay-lesbian-bi:8598 news.answers:78389 _________________________________________________________________ SOC.SUPPORT.YOUTH.GAY-LESBIAN-BI FAQ _________________________________________________________________ TABLE OF CONTENTS 1 About this FAQ 1.1 Administrivia 1.2 Credits 2 About the Newsgroup 2.1 What is the purpose of the newsgroup? 2.2 How do I post? 2.2.1 My post hasn't shown up yet! 2.2.2 What languages can I post in? +2.2.3 Can I post anonymously? 2.3 Who can participate? 2.4 What is the moderation policy? 2.4.1 I'd like to do research/post a survey about glb youth... 2.5 Can I access the group via a mailing list? 2.6 Is the group archived? 3 Resources for sexual minority youth 3.1 I want to get in contact with other gay youth +3.1.1 On the Net 3.1.2 Penpal services 3.2 I live in "SomeCity" -- where can I go to find support? 3.2.1 Britain 3.2.2 Canada 3.2.3 France 3.2.4 USA +3.2.5 Australia 3.3 What about books? 3.3.1 Pointers to other lists of books 3.3.2 Recommended Fiction 3.3.3 Recommended Non-fiction 3.3.4 How do I procure these books? 3.4 What about my parents? 3.5 Organizations specifically dedicated to glb youth 4 Other resources for sexual minorities 4.1 Usenet 4.2 Religious Resources +4.2.1 Christian 4.2.2 Jewish 4.2.3 Unitarian Universalist _________________________________________________________________ SECTION 1: ABOUT THIS FAQ _________________________________________________________________ This FAQ serves as an introduction and resource guide for the newsgroup soc.support.youth.gay-lesbian-bi. Please read this document before posting to the newsgroup. 1.1 Administrivia The most current copy of this FAQ can always be found at http://www.youth.org/ssyglb/ssyglb-faq.html. It is also archived in the official FAQ archives at rtfm.mit.edu. If you have comments, corrections, additions, or things you would like to see in this FAQ, e-mail us (glb-youth-request@ucsd.edu) and I would be happy to change/fix things. There are quite a few references in this document that have URLs pointing to the Queer Resource Directory (QRD). To quote from the soc.motss FAQ, maintained by David Casti: "All files are accessible via email, FTP, gopher, WAIS, and the world wide web. To receive a copy of the current QRD FAQ file, which includes instructions for using all of the QRD's many access methods, send mail to info@qrd.org. An autoreply will be generated and mailed back to you immediately." This FAQ is Copyright 1995 by Jane Patterson, and is made available as a service to the Internet community. It may not be sold in any medium, including electronic, CD-ROM, or database, packaged with any commercial product, or published in print, without the explicit, written permission of the author. 1.2 Credits I would like to thank the following people for their assistance and contributions to this FAQ: Joe Reilly (the original author of this FAQ), Harry Rezzemini, the staff of the QRD, DeaconMac, John David Moss, Reid Fishler, FREELORN@maths.bham.ac.uk, glbyouth@aol.com, David Casti, Greg Harma, Matt Black, Andrew Zolli and the wonderful people at Youth Assistance Organization _________________________________________________________________ SECTION 2: ABOUT THE NEWSGROUP _________________________________________________________________ 2.1 What is the purpose of the newsgroup? Soc.support.youth.gay-lesbian-bi is specifically a support group for young lesbians, gay men, bisexuals or transgendered persons. It's purpose is to provide a safe and regulated forum where such persons and their friends can help each other with support and advice drawn from their own experiences in coming to terms with their variant sexuality or gender identification. The charter of the group is available on the group's home page at http://www.youth.org/ssyglb/ 2.2 How do I post? At most sites, simply posting a message in the normal manner will result in your post being sent to one of the moderators. If this does not work, you can e-mail directory to glb-youth@ucsd.edu. If you have a question about posting, or want to know if your post ever got to a moderator, e-mail the group at glb-youth-request@ucsd.edu. 2.2.1 MY POST HASN'T SHOWN UP YET! If your post is rejected, you will receive an e-mail with the text of your post, and the reason it was rejected. (Unless the reason it was rejected was because your e-mail address was malformed). Because this is a moderated newsgroup, it can take several days for your post to travel to the moderator, where it may take a day or two to be processed, and then back out into the stream of Usenet, where it may take several days to reach your site. 2.2.2 WHAT LANGUAGE CAN I POST IN? Though the predominant language on ssyglb is English, we welcome submissions in German and Spanish as well. Foreign-language submissions will be judged by the same standards as all other submissions. +2.2.3 CAN I POST ANONYMOUSLY? Yes. The moderators will accept submissions sent through anonymous remailers, such as anon@anon.penet.fi and remailer@csua.berkeley.edu. Also, if you put a statement at the top of your message, in BIG, PROMINENT TYPE asking for your letter to be anonymized, we will post it without any identifying information. (We can't forward e-mail to you if you do this, however, so all of your replies will have to be posted to the newsgroup.) However, all submissions MUST contain a valid e-mail address that the moderators can use. If there is not, your message will not only be rejected, but the moderators will not be able to inform you when and why it was rejected. 2.3 Who can participate? SSYGLB is, as the name implies, a safe space for sexual minority youth. We invite and encourage people of all ages and orientations to participate if you feel you have something helpful or constructive to contribute. 2.4 What is the moderation policy? SSYGLB is moderated in order to make it a safe, high-signal forum. To that end, the moderators will reject: * Ad hominem personal attacks, unnecessary profanity or any other sort of flaming behavior. Strongly worded disagreements or rebuttals will not be rejected where they don't cross the line into gratuitous abuse or four letter diatribes. * As a support group, soc.support.youth.gay-lesbian-bi does not operate under the principle of "equal time". Consequently, under no circumstances will the moderators approve any messages containing homophobic abuse, declarations of the supposed immorality, condemnation or blanket judgement of homosexuality derived from any religious or secular source, or any other submission which the moderators consider contrary to the mutually supportive and friendly atmosphere of the group. * Off-topic posts: S.s.y.g-l-b is a group for gay, lesbian, bisexual, transgendered and exploring young people and their friends to exchange information and support relevant to their youth and sexuality. Any submission which is not of specific relevance to lesbian, gay, bisexual or transgendered youth - whether to specific people or in the abstract - is off-topic for this newsgroup. * Posts without a valid e-mail address attached. The moderators are willing to anonymize messages, or approve posts from anonymous remailers, but the moderators must be able to contact the person who sent the post. * Cross-posted articles * Binaries or uuencoded files. All binaries should be posted in the binary groups. * Personal ads are not approved under any circumstances. Requests for email which do not contain any other content of relevance or interest to the other readers of the group may be approved in exceptional circumstances at moderator's discretion, but in practice are rarely approved at all. Any request for email should be: + Non-sexual in nature. Sexual requests are always rejected whatever form they take. + Tagged on to an introduction to the other readers of the group, (a "demuffining") of sufficient length and detail to make interesting reading and add to the group atmosphere and dynamic. "Hi, My name's Peter and I'm 19. Does anyone else live in North Carolina? Email me if you do." is a (fictitious) example of the sort of submission the moderators receive all the time and reject. It add nothing to the group and says nothing that anyone would want to read. * Requests for information that is in the FAQ. * General discussions of gay politics/issues that aren't specifically youth related. (soc.motss, soc.bi, alt.politics.homosexuality, and other forums are more appropriate) The moderators reserve the right to edit approved posts. All personal snail mail addresses or telephone numbers will be removed from submissions. 2.4.1 I'D LIKE TO POST A SURVEY/DO RESEARCH ON GAY YOUTH Articles submitted from researchers, authors, etc. requesting infomation for their projects will be approved provided they: * Exclude questionnaires -- requests for participants are acceptable. * Introduce themselves to the readership, outlining the significance of their work to the group. * Agree to share the relevant findings with the group upon completion of their projects. * Agree to respect the rights and privacy of the responses taken from the group. (Receiving permission from posters for reprints of their comments) 2.5 Can I get this via a mailing list? Yes. A mailing list that mirrors this newsgroup has been set up, courtesy of Eric Walker. Warning: it is very high-traffic, and there is no digest function. To subscribe, send the message "subscribe glb-youth-l Your.email.address" to listserv@netcom.com. You will be automatically added, and sent information about the list and how to unsubscribe should you want to. (I recommend that you save that message!) 2.6 Is there an archive of the group anwhere? Not really. Individual moderators may keep archives of the msesages they approve and reject, but there are no easily accessible archives at this point. _________________________________________________________________ SECTION 3: RESOURCES FOR SEXUAL MINORITY YOUTH _________________________________________________________________ 3.1 I want to get in contact with other gay youth. As you will have noted in the moderation policy, we don't accept posts that are just requests for contact. But there are lots of ways to get in contact with other gay youth. 3.1.1 ON THE NET The newsgroup is, of course, a great place to meet people. Get involved in the discussions, and you should find some new friends fairly quickly. On Internet Relay Chat, visit the #gayteen channel. [Contributed by Andrew Zolli, PARADOX owner and admin] PARADOX, an online G/L/B/T/A/O Community. PARADOX is a MUD, or online virtual space, where you can meet others, chat online (in real time), check out a Queer newsfeed, and become, if you wish, a "resident," with your own password, your own virtual rooms to decorate, and access to PARADOX email. PARADOX is designed to be a free queer-safe space on the net. To access PARADOX, telnet to VASSUN.VASSAR.EDU 4040, or see the web pages at HTTP://WWW.CS.VASSAR.EDU/~anzolli/paradox.html There are a large number of gay-related mailing lists, ranging from Gay Catholics to Bisexual Theory Discussion. The best list is available from the QRD at http://www.qrd.org/QRD/electronic/email/lgbt-list-of-lists.html +There is a new list for young women: from eaog312@ea.oac.uci.edu GIRL, a list for and about girls, grrrls, young women, lesbian and feminist youth, "babydykes", "young and angrys"... (female and approximately 25 and younger). This list is private and unmoderated: to subscribe, it's mandatory that you send a brief bio (100 words or more) including your age, interest in the list, anything about your background, work, experiences or commitments, and anything else you want the listmembers to know (bios are posted when your subscription is accepted- you must request otherwise or this will be done automatically). The list is available in digest form, request this in your bio if you want this option. To subscribe, send a bio to: girl@uci.edu 3.1.2 PENPAL SERVICES IGYLO [Contributed by IGLYO chair Thomas Tichelmann, ay361@torfree.net] International Lesbian and Gay Youth Organization (IGLYO) has an international penpal service for anyone under 27. "Write to: IGLYO Main Secretariat PO Box 542 NL-1000 AM Amsterdam the Netherlands Please include a copy of any ID (so we can verify your age and that your are eligible, the data is protected by the European Data Protection Act), write a little bit about yourself and what you are looking for. IGLYO will then get back to you with other participants of the Penpal service. THIS SERVICE IS FREE OF CHARGE (However donations are welcome)" Orion Orion Services operates a glb penpal service, including a special youth service. Send an SASE to POBox 139, Hagaman, NY, 12086 Alyson Publications I know that Alyson publications used to have a youth penpal service, but I can't find any information about it. I would appreciate the details, if anyone has them 3.2 I live in SomeCity. Where can I go to find support? The following are ways of getting information via the Internet about "real life" resources. 3.2.1 BRITAIN [Contributed by FREELORN (FREELORN@maths.bham.ac.uk)] I've set up some Resource pages for L/G/B people which include details of youth groups, safer sex advice, advice/help phone lines, coming out stories, a shops/pubs/clubs guide and information and links to other organisations on theinternet. It covers all of Great Britain and Northern Ireland and more information is always being added. It is accessible at http://phymat.bham.ac.uk/LGB/ and any articles for submission can be sent to LGB@bham.ac.uk (please specify how anonymous you want the article to be). I do reserve the right to edit the articles for length and suitability (arcane British Laws and University restrictions). I'm really looking for British contributors or contributors that know the British scene. If you have any questions about submitting then do contact either LGB@bham.ac.uk or freelorn@maths.bham.ac.uk. 3.2.2 CANADA The Canadian QRD is on the WWW at http://pmax.dymaxion.ns.ca/~kc/iglbrd/canada/Welcome.html. 3.2.3 FRANCE The French QRD is at http://www.casti.com/FQRD/fqrd.html and http://acacia.ens.fr:8080/home/delmas/fqrd/fqrd.html 3.2.4 USA The QueerAmerica database exists to find glbo resources in the U.S. If you have WWW access, you can search the database at http://www.youth.org/outproud/. If you don't have WWW access, you can send e-mail to glbyouth@aol.com including your city, state, zipcode, area coda, age and gender, and the volunteers at !OutProud! will e-mail you a list of resources in your area appropriate to your age and gender. +3.2.5 AUSTRALIA The Australian QRD can be found at http://www.biz.usyd.edu.au/QRD 3.3 What about Books? Books are wonderful resources. They don't talk back, or react in ways you weren't expecting, and they contain lots and lots of information. 3.3.1 OTHER LISTS OF RELEVANT FICTION Before we get into the recommendations of ssyglb readers, I would like to recommend the "Alternative Sexualities in Fantasy and SF" list maintained by M.A. Mohanraj. It is posted occasionally and available on the WWW at http://mud.bsd.uchicago.edu/~mohanraj/balist.html. At the QRD, try http://www.qrd.org/QRD/media/books/, and another list, compiled by Lambda Rising Bookstore, is at http://plains.uwyo.edu/~lasaga/lists.html, and yet another at http://www.armory.com/~web/gaybooks.html 3.3.2 RECOMMENDED FICTION The following books have been recommended by readers of ssyglb or soc.motss. (and I am still taking recommendations :) Most of them are novels about coming out. Spelling has been cut and pasted from the messages, and is not guaranteed. Starred entries are endorsed by at least one of the moderators. * "Ambidextrous: a memoir in the form of a Novel" (Felice Picano) * "Landscape: Memory" (Matthew Stadler) * "White People" (a collection of short stories by Alan Garaganus) * "Funny Boy" (Shyam Selvadurai) * "Magic's Pawn","Magic's Price", "Magic's Promise" (Mercedes Lackey) * * "Pagan Babies" (Greg Johnson) * "Rubyfruit Jungle" (Rita Mae Brown) * * "Growing Up Gay/Growing Up Lesbian, A Literary Anthology" (edited by Bennett L. Singer) * "Tales of the City" (Armistead Maupin) * * +"Half Way Home", "Becoming A Man"[autobiography] (Paul Monette) * "Surprising Myself" (Christopher Bram) * "A Home at the End of the World" (Michael Cunningham) * "River Road" (C. F. Borgman) * "The Boys on the Rock" (John Fox) * "The Aerodynamics of Pork" (Patrick Gale) * "Maurice" (E. M. Forster) * "A Boy's Own Story" and its sequel "The Beautiful Room is Empty" (Edmund White) * +"The Best Little Boy in the World" (John Reid) * +"Annie on my Mind" (Nancy Garden) * +"Entries From A Hot Pink Notebook" (Todd D. Brown) * +"Living Upstairs" (Joseph Hansen) 3.3.3 RECOMMENDED NON-FICTION * "Twice Blessed: On Being Lesbian, Gay, and Jewish." (editors, Christie Balka and Andy Rose) Boston: Beacon Press, 1989. ISBN # 0807079081. * "Coming Out to Parents: a two-way survival guide for lesbians and gay men and their parents" (M.V. Borhek) Pilgrim Press, Cleveland,1993. * "Bi Any Other Name: Bisexual People Speak Out" (Edited by L. Hutchins & L. Kaahumanu) Alyson Publications, Boston, 1991. * "Reflections of a Rock Lobster" (Aaron Fricke) [autobiography] * "Taking A Chance on God" (John J McNeil) [for Catholics] 3.3.4 HOW DO I PROCURE THESE BOOKS? A gay bookstore, if you can find one, is usually a wonderful place, where you can find information about support resources in your community as well as books. If you can't find one or are not ready to go to one yet: Answer 1: Go to the library. [Contributed by harry.rezzemini@library.gatech.edu (Harry Rezzemini)] "An "ISBN" is an International Standard Book Number, by which any bookstore worthy of that name would be able to order the title for you. Also, for those inquiring minds...like me...who have little cash to back up book-buying sprees, I encouage you to use libraries. That's not only because I work in one--but because I do, I can attempt to reassure you that by and large, libraries TRY and most often SUCCEED to be safe places to...explore. One early post to s.s.y.glb mentioned fears about checking out books on sexuality...well, okay. It's uncomfortable to and that person across the counter your selections--but know this: libraries have iron-clad rules (backed up by legal precedent) against telling ANYONE what you've checked out. That's why when Bozo checks out the only copy of the book EVERYONE needs for a class...the folks at the front desk CAN'T tell you who has it. It's against the law. So go check out those uncomfortable books--consider it practice for BUYING CONDOMS! Also know that the American Library Association is one of the staunchest opponents of censorship or book-banning or limiting the unrestricted access of everyone to information, in any way. That's not to say that policies may not be in place in your local library which might be different." Answer 2: Mail order [Contributed by DeaconMac (deaconmac@aol.com)] Virtually every gay and lesbian book in print can be ordered from Lambda Rising Bookstores. For ordering information, send e-mail to: lambdarising@his.com. 3.4 What about my parents? Coming out to your parents is probably one of the harder things most of us do in our coming-out process. There is no one easy answer for the "proper" way to do it -- if you have questions about coming out to your parents, please ask them on the group, where there is frequently lively discussion on that very topic. And yes, we'd love to hear your coming out stories. :) +PFLAG (Parents and Friends of Lesbians and Gays) has support groups for parents of gay children. You can call 202-638-4200 in the U.S. to find a chapter near your parents. They also have excellent pamphlets about coming out. You can get more information from Emily Rizzo, a PFLAG member on the 'net. Her e-mail address is Rizzoe@fasecon.econ.nyu.edu, and she can send you more information. (Thank you, Emily!) Please note that the 1-800 number is no longer available. 3.5 ORGANIZATIONS SPECIFICALLY DEDICATED TO GLB YOUTH Youth Assistance Organization [Contributed by root@youth.org (Reid Fishler) aka redhead@liii.com] The Youth Assistance Organization (YAO) can be found on-line, at youth.org. See their web pages at http://www.youth.org/ " As always, if you or a friend need help, mail to help@youth.org, and your peers will be happy to help you. We are here for you because no one was here for us...don't repeat this misjustice." Kaleidoscope Youth Coalition, Inc. [Contributed by Greg Harma (gregharma@aol.com)] Kaleidoscope Youth Coalition is a growing organization whose Mission is to enrich and foster the positive growht and development of gay, lesbian, and bisexual youth and transgender youth through education, information, advocacy, self-empowerment, resource development, collaboration, coalition building, and community. Kaleidoscope Youth Coalition is working with a local child-serving agency to create and implement a 24-hour hotline for young people who are experiencing issues around sexual orientation or gender orientation. RAINBOW PRIDE HOTLINE (1-800-291-9190) began July 1, 1994 and is available for support/crisis intervention and information/referral. To receive more information or to speak with someone about the ways in which you or your organization may become involved, please contact us at 614/447-7199 or write to us: Kaleidoscope Youth Coalition, Inc. PO Box 8104 Columbus, OH 43201 International Lesbian and Gay Youth Organization IGLYO's objectives are: * to improve the lives of young lesbians, gays and bisexuals worldwide * to bring an end to discrimination * to support the emancipation of young lesbians, gays and bisexuals worldwide * to create equal opportunities for all young people More information is available from: IGLYO Main Secretariat PO Box 542 NL-1000 AM Amsterdam the Netherlands IGLYO America PO Box 42463 Washington DC 20016-0463 USA IGLYO is a registered non-profit organization in the European Union (based in Amsterdam) and the USA _________________________________________________________________ SECTION 4: OTHER RESOURCES FOR SEXUAL MINORITIES _________________________________________________________________ Disclaimer: I am not going to attempt to cover everything, as that has been done before, and duplicating the effort would be silly. So what follows is mostly pointers to large collections of resources. 4.1 Usenet There are several other Usenet groups for sexual minorities. The FAQs for soc.motss,soc.bi, and soc.support.transgendered are all excellent sources of information, and can be found in the FAQ archives at rtfm.mit.edu, as well as in their groups of origin and news.answers. 4.2 Religious resources Many of us face apparent contradiction or lack of support in our communities of faith. We can be surprised and relieved to find support within our religious groups. Please be aware that the following are Seattle-centric. Please feel free to email me additions in any category or additions of categories. Many faiths are omitted because I am lacking information. If you don't see something that addresses you, please post to the newsgroup to find out where your support is in your community of faith. +4.2.1 CHRISTIAN Many communities house a Metropolitan Community Church, which is a Christian Church specifically dedicated to serving the sexual minority Christian Community. Information about MCC can be found in the QRD at http://www.qrd.org/qrd/religion/orgs/MCC/ The Lesbian and Gay Christian Movement can be reached on the WWW at http://www.dur.ac.uk/~dth2mnv/lgcm.html, and by snail mail at The Lesbian and Gay Christian Movement (LGCM) Oxford House Derbyshire Street London E2 6HG U.K. Dignity is a faith community of lesbian, gay, bisexual Catholics, & their families & friends. We celebrate our inherent dignity with pride in liturgy, mutual support, seeking justice, common action, & social activities. Information, including contact information, for Dignity is available from the QRD at http://www.qrd.org/qrd/religion/orgs/DIGNITY/. A Dignity listserv (dignity@american.edu) can be subscribed to via listserv@american.edu. Affirmation is a support and social network for L.D.S. (Mormon) gays & lesbians, their families, & friends. Monthly meetings & social activities. Outstanding newsletter; nationally affiliated. (Affirmation/Seattle can be contacted at P.O. Box 23223, Seattle, WA 98102) Presbyterians for Lesbian and Gay Concerns have their newsletters available from the QRD at http://www.qrd.org/qrd/religion/orgs/PLGC/ There is a gay Christian mailing list - contact LUTI-owner@vector.casti.com for details. 4.2.2 JEWISH Beth El Binah, a gay Jewish congregation in Texas, has a home page on the WWW at http://www.global.org/beth.el.binah/ 4.2.3 UNITARIAN UNIVERSALIST Unitarian Universalism is a liberal, non-dogmatic church that officially confirmed (in the 1970s) its acceptance of gay and lesbian people. Most UU ministers will perform committment ceremonies for same-sex couples. A plethora of information about UUs and queer concerns can be found at http://www.qrd.org/qrd/www/uua/ _________________________________________________________________ Please send all comments, corrections or additions to the moderators, glb-youth-request@ucsd.edu To submit an article, e-mail to glb-youth@ucsd.edu To contact the moderators, e-mail to glb-youth-request@ucsd.edu