Ahab, the Arab Ray Stevens Written by Ray Stevens Peaked at # 5 in 1962 Live version (intro: Arabian flute) Let me tell you about Ahab the Arab The sheik of the burning sand He had emeralds and rubies just drippin' off 'a him And a ring on every finger of his hand He wore a big ol' turban wrapped around his head And a scimitar by his side And, every evenin', about midnight He'd jump on his camel named Clyde, and ride [Spoken] Silently through the night to the sultan's tent where he would secretly meet up with Fatima of the Seven Veils, swingingest grade "A" number one US choice dancer in the sultan's whole harem, 'cause, heh, him and her had a thing goin', you know, and they'd been carryin' on for some time now behind the sultan's back and you could hear him talk to his camel as he rode out across the dunes, his voice would cut through the still night desert air and he'd say (imitate Arabic speech and finish with "Sold! American) which is Arabic for, "Stop, Clyde!" and Clyde'd say, (imitate camel sound), which is camel for, "What the heck did he say anyway?" Well, he brought that camel to a screechin' halt (verbal screeching sound) In the rear of Fatima's tent Jumped off Clyde, snuck around the corner And into the tent he went. There he saw Fatima layin' on a zebra skin rug With [Spoken in falsetto and possibly with female backups] "Rings on her fingers and bells on her toes and a bone in her nose ho, ho." [Spoken] There she was, friends, lyin' there in all her radiant beauty, eating on a raisin, grape, apricot, pomegranate, bowl of chittlin's, two bananas, three Hershey bars, sipping on a RC co-cola listenin' to her transistor, watchin' the Grand Ole Opry on the tube, readin' a Mad magazine while she sung, "Does your chewing gum lose it's flavor?" Yeah, Ahab walked up to her and he say, (imitate Arabic speech), which is Arabic for "Let's twist again like we did last summer, baby.!!" Ha, ha, ha!! You know what I mean! Whew! She looked up at him from off the rug, give him one of the sly looks, She said (suggestive giggles, then outright laughter) "Crazy, crazy, crazy baby!" ('round and around and around and around, and around and around and around) Yeah, and that's the story 'bout Ahab the Arab The sheik of the burnin' sand Ahab the Arab, the swingin' sheik of the burnin' sand