RELATIVES > > Many many years ago when I was twenty three, > I got married to a widow who was pretty as could be. > This widow had a grown-up daughter > Who had hair of red. > My father fell in love with her, > And soon the two were wed. > > This made my dad my son-in-law > And changed my very life. > My daughter was my mother, > For she was my father's wife. > > To complicate the matters worse, > Although it brought me joy, > I soon became the father > Of a bouncing baby boy. > > My little baby then became > A brother-in-law to dad. > And so became my uncle, > Though it made me very sad. > > For if he was my uncle, > Then that also made him brother > To the widow's grown-up daughter > Who, of course, was my step-mother. > > Father's wife then had a son, > Who kept them on the run. > And he became my grandson, > For he was my daughter's son. > > My wife is now my mother's mother > And it makes me blue. > Because, although she is my wife, > She's my grandmother too. > > If my wife is my grandmother, > Then I am her grandchild. > And every time I think of it, > It simply drives me wild. > > For now I have become > The strangest case you ever saw. > As the husband of my grandmother, > I am my own grandpa!