How to be a Perfect Asian-American Parent (from the second generation 
perspective)

 1.  Be a little more lenient on the 7PM curfew.
 2.  Don't ask where the other point went when your child comes home with a
     99 course grade on his/her report card.
 3.  Don't "ai-yoh" loudly at your kid's dress habits.
 4.  Don't blatantly hint about the merits of Hal-vald (Harvard), Yale-uh
     (Yale), Stanfold (Stanford), and Emeh-I-Tee (MIT).
 5.  Don't reveal all the intimate details of your kid's life to the entire
     Asian community.
 6.  Don't ask your child, "What are you going to do with you life" if
     he/she majors in a non-science field.
 7.  Don't give your son a bowl haircut or your daughter two acres of bangs. 
 8.  Don't try to set your kid up on a date in anticipation of their poor
     taste or inept social skills.
 9.  Incorporate other phrases besides "Did you study yet?" into your daily
     conversations with your children.
10.  Don't ask all your kid's friends over the age of 21 if they have a
     boy/girlfriend yet.


How to Be a Perfect Asian-American Kid (from the first generation perspective)

 1.  Score 1600 on the SAT.
 2.  Play the violin or piano on the level of a concert performer.
 3.  Apply to and be accepted by 27 colleges.
 4.  Have three hobbies: studying, studying, and studying.
 5.  Go to a prestigious Ivy League university and win enough scholarship to
     pay for it.
 6.  Love classical music and detest talking on the telephone.
 7.  Become a Westinghouse, Presidential, and eventually a Rhodes Scholar.
 8.  Aspire to be a brain surgeon.
 9.  Marry a Chinese-American doctor and have perfect, successful children.
10.  Love to hear stories about your parents' childhood...especially the one
     about walking 7 miles to school without shoes.