<< A DoG cALLeD *SeX* > > everybody i know who has a dog usually calls him *rover* or *spot*..i >called >mine *sex*..now sex has been very embarrassing to me..when i went to the >city >hall to renew the dog's license for sex..i told the clerk i'd like a >license >for sex..he said.. > "i would like to have one too!"..then i said.. > "she is a dog!!"..he said he didnt care what she looked like..i said.. > "you don't understand..i had sex since i was 9 years old."..he replied.. > "you must have been quite a strong boy." > > when i decided to get married..i told the minister that i would like to >have >sex at the weddimg..he told me to wait until after the wedding was >over..i >said.. > "but sex has played a big part in my life and my life revolves around >sex."..he said he didn't want to hear about my personal life and would >not >marry us in his church..i told him everybody would like having sex at the >wedding..the next day..we were married at the justice of peace..my family >is >barred from the church then on.. > > when my wife and i went on out honeymoon..i took the dog with me..when >we >checked into the motel, i told the clerk that i wanted a room for me and >my >wife and a special room for sex..he said every room in the motel is a >place >for sex..i said.. > "you don't understand..sex keeps me awake at night.."..the clerk said.. > "me too!" > > one day i entered sex in a contest..but before the competition >began..sex >ran away..another contestant asked me why i was just looking around..i >told >him that i was going to have sex in the contest..he said that i should >have >sold my own tickets.. > "you don't understand!!"..i said.."i hoped to have sex on TV!!".. > he called me a show off.. > > when my wife and i seperated..we went to court to fight for custody of >the >dog..i said.. > "your honor..i had sex before i was married..but sex left me after i was >married..".. > the judge said.. > "me too!!" > > last night..sex ran off again..i spent hours looking all over for her..a >cop >came over and asked me what i was doing in the alley at 4 o'clock in the >morning..i said.. > "i'm looking for sex..".. > my case comes up next thursday.. > > well..now i have been thrown in jail..been divorced..and had more damn >troubles with that dog than i ever foresaw..why..just the other day when >i >went for my first session with my psychiatrist..she asked me.. > "what seems to be the trouble?"..i replied.. > "sex has been my best friend all of my life..but now it has left me >forever..i couldn't live any longer..so lonely.."..and the doctor said.. > "look mister..you should understand sex isn't a man's best friend..so >get >yourself a dog.." > > >-^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v >^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^- > > *iF yOo ReAd tHiS oN a SuNdAy..WiSh fOr a ReALLy FuN wEeK.. > *iF yOo ReAd tHiS oN a MoNdAy..WiSh fOr MoNeY.. > *iF yOo ReAd tHiS oN a TuEsDaY..WiSh fOr LoVe.. > *iF yOo ReAd tHiS oN a WeDneSdAy..WiSh fOr SuCceSs.. > *iF yOo ReAd tHiS oN a tHuRsDaY..WiSh fOr aNyThiNg yOo wAnT.. > *iF yOo ReAd ThiS oN a fRiDaY..WiSh fOr a ReALLy hOt dAte.. > *iF yOo ReAd tHiS oN a SaTuRdAy..WiSh fOr aN iMpoRtAnt phOne caLL.. > >-^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v >^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^- > > SeNd tHiS tO 7 oR mOre pEopLe..(aFteR yOo mAke a WiSh)..MaKe sHuRe iT iS >mAiLeD aS sOoN aS yOo ReAd iT oR yOuR WiSh wOn'T cOme >tRue..REMEMBER..MaKe a >WiSh aNd..SeNd tHiS LeTteR..aNd hOpe iT hAppeNs..