As none of us are getting any younger, I thought you might enjoy this
 memo. I am not certain of it authenticity but it is funny and it gives a
 good perspective on us aging folks.
 TO: State College Faculty
 RE: Incoming Freshmen, 1999

 The people who are starting college this fall across the nation were born
 in 1980. They have no meaningful recollection of the Reagan Era and do not
 know he was shot.
 They were pre-pubescent when George Bush waged the Persian Gulf War.
 Black Monday 1987 is as significant to them as the Great Depression.
 They were eleven years old when the Soviet Union broke apart and they do
 not remember the Cold War.
 They are too young to remember the space shuttle exploding.
 Tianamen Square means nothing to them.
 Their lifetime has always included AIDS.
 Bottle caps have always been screw-off and plastic.
 Atari predates them, as do vinyl albums.
 The expression "you sound like a broken record" means nothing to them.
 They have never owned a record player, nor a record.
 They have likely never played Pac Man and have never heard of Pong.
 Star Wars looks very fake to them, and the special effects are pathetic.
 They may have heard of an 8-track, but probably have never actually heard
 nor seen one.
 The Compact Disc was introduced when they were 1 year old.
 As far as they know, stamps have always cost about 32 cents.
 They have always had an answering machine.
 Most have never seen a TV set with only 13 channels, nor have they seen a
 black-and-white TV.
 They have always had cable.
 There have always been VCR's, but they have no idea what BETA is.
 They cannot fathom not having a remote control.
 They were born in the year Sony introduced the Walkman.
 Roller-skating has always meant inline for them.
 Jay Leno has always hosted The Tonight Show (Who was Doc Sevrenson?).
 They have no idea when or why Jordache jeans were cool.
 Popcorn has always been cooked in the microwave.
 "What, you did not have a microwave?!"
 They have never seen Larry Bird play; and Kareem Abdul-Jabar is a football
 player for the Miami Dolphins.
 Fox has always carried NFC games.
 Every game of the NCAA Tournament has always been broadcasted live.
 They never took a swim at the beach and thought about Jaws.
 The Vietnam War is as ancient history to them as W.W. I, W.W.II, or even
 the Civil War.
 They have no idea that Americans were ever held hostage in Iran.
 They can not imagine what hard contact lenses are.
 They do not know who Mork was or where he was from.
 They never heard: 'Where's the Beef?'; 'I'd walk a mile for a Camel.'; or
 'de plane, de plane!'
 They do not care who shot J.R. and have no idea who J.R. was.
 "The Titanic was found? I thought we always knew where it was."
 Kansas, Chicago, Boston, America, and Alabama are places, not groups.
 McDonald's never came in Styrofoam containers.
 There has always been MTV.
 Their car windows and locks have always been power.
 They do not think $25,000 will be a good salary for their first job out of
 college.