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:%		  CUTTING CLASS - PART 1 :  FAKE SICKNESS		    %:
:%			       Written by: Tempus			    %:
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:%		       Call The Rebel Alliance MegCatline		    %:
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  Everyone needs a little time off once in a while.  Who cares how they get that
time off.  Most play sick.  I will share a few of my own personal experiences
with playing sick.

  First, there's the "I don't feel well".  Usually gets at least a raised
eyebrow.  They feel your forehead and say you're OK.  Bullshit.  If you can let
the corners of your mouth sag, it helps.  Then there are the mysterious body
aches.	You feel a cramp in your stomach or side ...  They will be a bit
concerned.  Then there is the light-headedness.  It will get good results if
used properly.

  But best of all is the BARF.	When you puke, you're SICK, as far as they are
concerned.  Your ass is staying at home.  Most idiots will go in the bathroom
and stick their FINGERS down their fuckin' throats!  How droll.  If you want an
good upchuck, use the miracle drug:  IPECAC SYRUP!  This wonder is available in
any Supermarket, near the Mercurochrome and the Iodine.  Most always near the
pharmacy, if there is one.  The stuff will run about two bucks a bottle, good
for about 5 or so good barfs.  Read the instructions carefully, as it is a drug.
The stuff works wonders at school.  It is well worth investing time and money,
unless you can just steal it.  It comes in a small bottle.

  Also, if you do go to the doctor, just tell him you also have diarrhea, and he
will say it is some kind of virus.  The runs is a catch-all with medicos.  Only
viruses cause it.  But don't give a sample of your shit.

-- ADDED EFFECTS (Thanx to MAXFILES) --

  Dazed look:  Dilated pupils, generally spaced, and slow actions & reactions.

  High/Low Temp:  Going to the nurse after PE will make you look worn out & you
will have a higher body temp.  (if cold out, stand outside.)

  High Stress Lv:  Making yourself tense (and/or increasing your heartrate will
add to your "sickness".

  Irregular Metabolism:  Using NO-DOZE will create irregularities in your
metabolism which will also improve your "sickness".

  Nice Sad Lies:  About your:  Lack of sleep, Lack of appetite, Amount of
stress...

Enjoy!




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	     Tempus

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-TBB	 [April 3, 1985]
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