+----------------------------+ | | | Antisocial Inc. Presents | | | | TURTLE EGGS | | | | Brought to you by: | | | | ABADON | | and | | EDDIE THE ED | | | | Copyright (C) 1991 | | All rights reserved | | | +---------------------------+ Some of you might be wondering, why the fuck are these dickheads tellimg me about turtle eggs? Well, we're not talking about real eggs fuckhead. We're talking about turtle eggs that will totally fuck over a car's engine. Turtle eggs were used in World War II by prison camp workers to destroy enemy vehicles. It's so fucking simple that all those "big" wankers that are too busy cleaning up after their last failed experiment were too dense to figure it out. So, now, get your thumbs out of your asses and pay attention. SHIT YOU NEED TO SCROUNGE UP ---------------------------- 1 latex condom (none of this "sheep skin feels better" bullshit. You're not gonna be wearing it you stupid fuck.) 1 Handful of sugar (now, don't start asking how big a handful is dickweed.) Now, wasn't that simple? OK now boys and girls, here's what to do: 1. Put the sugar in the condom. 2. Tie a knot in the condom so that the opening is closed off. 3. Throw the condom in the car's gas tank. The way this works is the gas eats through the latex condom, releasing the sugar into the gas tank. Voila. One majorly fucked engine. Note: Any dubmfuck can pour sugar in a gas tank, but this is a delayed reaction (you don't want Joe Blow's car breaking down in front of your house and having him bug the shit out of you...) MORE TURTLE EGGS ---------------- 1. Latex Condom 2. Handful of Crystal Draino Do the same as above, but as soon as you drop the egg in the tank, run like a motherfucker. The gas, as before, eats through the condom, but then the gas reacts violently with the draino (in other words, BOOM!) Note: Good way to kill people. Disclaimer: This is all for informational use only (yeah, right) so you bloody wankers can't do shit to us! So, if you get caught doing this shit, don't go blaming it on us. By the way, if I hurt your feelings, I apologise. But, one last thing. FUCK YOU!