BAR Bad Ass Retards presents "How To Steal" OK. You know how when you go to steal things you can always have a little trouble. Well this file is going to tell you all the things that can help prevent that. And how to steal from certain places. You don't want to get caught and neither do I. My method has never been caught ever. Contents:Long sleeve shirt Big bag that is not see through And yourself #1.This is wear you are going to need the long sleeve shirt. Go into a store. Take your time looking around. You don't want to look suspicios. Find all the cameras that are in the store. Now that you knwo where they are located you are in business. Find the item that you wish to steal. It does not matter if you are infront of a camara or not. They wont be able to pick this up. Have you long sleeve shirt on. Make it so your hand is in the sleeve. Then what you do is stick your hand over top of the item you want. You then have it in your sleeve. The cameras have no clue what you have done and now you are home free. #2.This is for items that are pretty big. You need to have your bag now. OK walk around the store and do the same procedure. Find the item that you want to steal. Put two of the items down on the ground. If they are small enough put two of them in your hand. Your back has to be to the camara though. Now the people watching the camaras think that you have just picked up one. You put the one in the bag and then carry around the other one for a while. Like you are going to buy it. They think that nothing is up. Then you act like you just saw the price on it. You then go and put it back. Then just to be safe. Go and buy something that costs about a dollar. You can leave the store and nothing will happen to you. #3.This is how to steal CD's and Tapes from record stores. This will only work on the ones that have the alarms set up. Have you ever seen those little alarm thinigs on your c.d.s, well now you are goign to find out how to steal these with out getting caught. Take off the alarm sticker. They are just stick on things so they are very easy to get off. Then you stick that alarm sticker on someones back. Once that they walk out of the store, the alarm will go off. Now that they are totally checking out this guy that you put the alarm on, you are now leaving. You have pulled all of the alarm stickers off of your tapes and cds. You can walk right on out. They wont even look at you. #4.Have you ever wante to steal from K-Mart, or WalMart. Well this is the way to do it. Wait until it is about closing time there. All the people at the in there will be tired. Most of the people shopping have left for the night. The man that usually watches the door is also not there. You grab the thing that you want and carry it into there garden center. If they have one. You can then walk right on out. Have the thing in your bag and the people wont even look at you. If the don't have a garden center then go to somewhere in the back. Like the shoe departement. Nobody ever is in there. This will always work and is fun doing it. #5.Stealing from Topps. You might think that this is hard to do but it is really not. Walk into the store with an empty box. You have found this box in the garbage cans, or the dumster there. You walk into the store and go and put the box down where its identical merchandise is. You then walk away for a moment. When you come back you take another box that has something in it. You walk out of the store. Then the guy who works at the door that asks to see your receit asks to see it. You say "oh, I was just returning this. The workers here said that I could return it." Then the dumb ass will say "OK" Then you are through. It helps to have a women do the stealing for this one. They always give them a little bit more sympathy. BAR'93 jUNGLE jIMMY